Perhaps it's Corporate Culture.

Artist Unknown

We are 10 days into September and I am ready for a vacation.  

The older I get the more I realize the real importance of doing what you love to never feel like you've worked a day in your life.

Today I realize that I enjoy what I do but I don't love it.  I enjoy the pay, I enjoy the work on most days, but I don't enjoy working with others anymore.  Perhaps it is because I am not passionate about what I am doing, I simply enjoy it... most days. 

"Corporate Culture" has too many unwritten and unspoken rules and I no longer feel obligated to give them life.  Doing things like they have always been done has never been my way of thinking and the older I get, the more I want to be free of all the bullshit.  What are we doing?????  

If the goal of the organization I have dedicated my time to says that the mission equates to the value and I support that mission and believe in the value, then why aren't my thoughts on the matter just as important as someone in the C-Suite?

Every business I know of has started with a minimum of one person.  One idea that turned into a conversation, some hearing the idea saw the vision and created a mission that employs people that - you would hope- also support the mission.  

That is not what most of these companies are now.  

They represent paychecks, benefits, and a forced culture of togetherness.  What most office environments lack is the TRUE freedom and flexibility to create real relationships with those you work with.  Everything is forced now.

If I want to be friends with Betty in Public Policy and Veronica in the mailroom, that is my business and I want to cultivate those relationships how I see fit.  Now, if I want to ignore Sally in Finance, I would like to do that.  

But most importantly, I NEVER want to go into the office to do any of this.

Excuse my mind dump but before I clock in, I need to unload.

Do you know what was the best thing about the 2020 Pandemic?  

Solitude.

I had the power to decide who I saw in the flesh & when I saw them, I could work all day and night if I wanted to and was happy to do so because when you work for an organization that is essential, you not only understand the mission and the vision, you use everything you have and know to support it.  You are a part of a place that is doing the work to help the world run smoothly and there can be nothing but pride and honor in doing that.  

However, as soon as we were told that we could go back outside, everyone went wild.  

Now we are back to standing way too close, people coughing without covering their mouths and forced to speak to the Sally's of Finance after having a delightful 2 years realizing that you NEVER needed to see her to complete your job in the first place...

I miss the freedom of not being bothered.  Yes, I am happy that outside has opened back up but I miss, missing out.  

I miss learning about my house, I miss the time to do laundry; cook, wash dishes, and put them away.  I miss waking up and logging in before sunrise, getting 3 hours of work done then the power to choose to make some coffee, spend time with my pets, and then gently ease back into the workday and realizing that I HAPPILY worked well over 80 hours and never counted a minute. 

*Deep sigh*

Now, I am wishing away my weeks because everyone needs a little "Facetime".  Newsflash: No you don't.  

Sityoassdown&doyowork!  

Most people that need all that Facetime are not doing shit.  They have been 'planning' on doing that project since last winter and still don't have an outline.  They keep talking about that shit and want you to say that you will do it but I have been living long enough to know that my ministry is not volunteerism.

Everyone is called to serve and it is important to know in what way you are called and completing the project of another is not my ministry.  Never has been, nor will it ever be.  Why?  

Because what I know is that they never had any intention of doing the work themselves.  It was always their hope that someone would take that off their plate and I am full.

When I am not full, I am hunting.  To put it bluntly, I applied for MY job, NOT yours.  

Perhaps I could love what I do if I wasn't in constant battle to do what I enjoy doing without all the other bullshit.  

It appears that I really do LOVE my job when I think about eliminating all the other crap that PEOPLE created for us to do that has NOTHING to do with what I applied to be doing.

Corporate Culture is nothing it should be & more then less than what it could be.

I need to think about what the ideal Corporate setting would be for me... Perhaps knowing what sort of environment I could envision flourishing in will help me find how to not only enjoy what I do but, revitalize the love that has been lost.

Perhaps, I can rekindle the love for the work if I can find a way to not be forced to engage in the "culture" of the corporation.  The heart and passion of those of service should be enough to create a culture that will outlive everyone involved.

The people are the culture, the culture creates the vibe, the vibe attracts like minds, and the love will continue, perhaps.